In my village Chettinad, most of the houses were built in the rows, whereas the rich peoples' bungalows were built very nicely thus occupying the entire street. They have porch, garden, lawn and the orchard. The tall coconut trees, curry-leaf trees, chickoo trees and mango trees would be growing in all their bungalows. The huge compound wall protects the bungalow from the trespassers. The courtyard was huge and big enough for the children to play the outdoor games. The owners of the bungalows employed the security guards to take care of the bungalows. As most of my friends were coming from these rich Chettiar families, I always had been to their bungalows during the week ends. We used to play the hide-and-seek, police and the thief, throw-ball and kabbadi. Sometimes my two younger brothers used to accompany me, and we all enjoyed the chocolates, snacks and fruits given by my friends' families. That was the first time, I have tasted the chocolates — and it was very yummy. The chocolate papers were shiny and colourful, and I have made the small toys, butterflies out of it. My friends' fathers were away to Malaya and Singapore for doing business (money trading and rubber business), and they used to bring lots of chocolates, dry fruits, gifts, toys, and dresses, etc. to their families during their visit to India. I was very much fascinated to play the battery-operated toys — and my brothers too were keen in playing with the remote-control cars and water guns. ** In those days, I always was fond of eating any amount of yogurt rice with tangy pickles; any number of dosais (a kind of pancake made out of rice and black gram). Everyone identified me as 'Fatty Banoo,' as there was another Banu who was slim and thin in my class. So I was shy-free to enjoy the eateries in my friends' houses. Sometimes my mom send them some snacks also, and they all liked it very much. As our family was a big family, my parents seldom got us new clothes. During the festival times like Deepavali, Pongal, they bought us the dresses. Almost for all of us it would be the same design but different colours. I have to mention here that we were most obedient to our parents and never demanded anything. We had a lovely time and never complained or regretted for anything. * There was an old tailor called Subbiah, who sewed the blouses and gowns for us; he was good at sewing the shirts also for my dad and brothers. Though I was wearing the skirts, gowns etc., I was fond of wearing the boys' attire also. One time that tailor had stitched a shirt for me with the available excess material of my dad's shirt. It was beautiful with nice collars and buttons with tiny pockets. I was so happy to see that, and wore that shirt with my brother's half pant (shorts). My mom loved it, and I still remember the colour of it. Yes — it was a pale yellow shirt. The outfit was perfect for me and I felt happy. In fact I just imagined myself as a strong boy who could be brave enough to challenge with the street boys while playing the kabbadi. Wearing that shirt and shorts, I went to my friend's place for playing. My friend Sita's mom looked at me strangely and asked, "Hey Banoo! What is this dress you are wearing? Like a cowboy! So funny!" "Oh, I love this dress, Aunty!" Hearing my reply she burst into laughter. "Oh, poor Brahmin girl! What to say? You don't even feel shy for wearing this kind of dress, and you don't realise also that you are running short of girls' attire." She went inside and brought me some colourful dresses. "Banoo! Take all — these are all our daughter Sita's dresses, and she seldom wore them only for few times. As she is also fat, it may be fitting you well. Take this and wear anywhere you go. You would be more prettier in these dresses than the boy's attire." The dresses were in blue, violet, pink, green and yellow with shining buttons on it. The dolls, cartoons and the balloons with so many designs on the dress have made it more gorgeous. The embroidery work was so intricate, and it looked so grand with beautiful frills. Wow! I was overwhelmed to see that the dresses were from Malaya (the present Malaysia). * I felt so happy and thanked that aunty. I rushed back home and told my mom that my friend's mother was very kind enough to gift me good amount of dresses — and I wanted to try them immediately. Really I was much excited to receive it, and wanted to wear at once. Oh, no — what happened? My mother's face became so red, and she looked very upset. "Hey Banoo… what is this? Did you tell her that you are running short of dresses, or you don't have enough to wear?" "No, mom — I never said like that. In fact I told her that I loved that cowboy attire." My mom screamed again. "Banoo — how can you accept things from others?" I started crying. "Oh, mom! I have not asked her for anything, trust me. She only gave me. I never thought it would bother you so much — and in fact I don't understand what you mean also." My mother looked at me deeply and sighed for a while. "My dear little girl — let me tell you something. We may not have enough money, comforts or luxury, etc. But we have good enough to wear, to eat and to live with — so as to meet up our requirements. May be you won't understand now, but you should know that one must live within their means. We should have some principles and discipline to stick with while leading our life. When you grow bigger you will understand this. I won't encourage you to accept anything from others, as it would lead you to go beyond your needs. Now I am happy that you have not asked for it, and that lady only gave you out of sympathy. Go to your friend's place and return these dresses with a note of thanks." ** I ran back to my friend's place and returned them. At that young age, I never understood that it's a shameful act to accept the things from others — but when I grew older I came to understand the moral behind it. It was my mother who taught the valuable morals by inculcating the good manners and discipline in me. Believe it or not, from that day onwards I never ever have been longing for anything, and learnt to live within the limits. I am happy indeed for what I am blessed with, and I gratefully think of my mother who taught me many more things to make me a better person. — Banooravi